Monday, 23 July 2012

London under seige

“Go back to bed, America. Your government has figured out how it all transpired. Go back to bed, America. Your government is in control again. Here. Here's American Gladiators. Watch this, shut up. Go back to bed, America. Here is American Gladiators. Here is 56 channels of it! Watch these pituitary retards bang their fucking skulls together and congratulate you on living in the land of freedom. Here you go, America! You are free to do what we tell you! You are free to do what we tell you!”

― Bill Hicks

Replace America with 'Great Briton' and American Gladiators with the 'Olympic Games'.

News flash

The games lanes causing havoc in London!

This morning I arrived at Tottenham Court Road to hear that due to 'a person under a train' westbound services were suspended.  People often quite irritatingly clamber under tube trains. I do wonder what they do down there.

Fortunately I was going eastbound however I am also somewhat retarded and mistook east for west thus I hurried out of the tube and planned to 'bus it' down new oxford street (A40). Only something strange had happened and it appeared the street had been turned into a bus stand. The street all the way down to Holborn was stationary in all directions (so I walked) .

I suspect an Olympic sized fuck up may have occured. The traffic was so bad even cyclists were stuck.

But alas I was not alone it seems as thousands of people driving into London encountered a fabulous British phenomenon; a large queue. The BBC's Tom Edwards offered some 'profound' analysis;

"What TfL are trying to do is control the amount of traffic that gets onto the Olympic Route Network to - their words - "protect the venues".

What that does in reality is force traffic out of town.

This wasn't a mistake, this wasn't a one-off and it wasn't a freak occurrence. This is part of the plan and it will only get worse when the other Games Lanes are activated on Wednesday. "

Now few sane people attempt to commute into London by car anyway but I suspect much of the traffic is commerical bringing supplies and services into the capital. Is it part of the Olympic plan to starve London in a modern twist on the medieval siege?

Still best not let the 14 million people living in London get in the way of the IOC private party. Alas I hope the delays on the A13 mean their oysters are rather spoiled.

More and more I must agree that these London Olympics look like an event one would have in a Totalitarian state. They make Beijing and their fake singing girl and fake fireworks look rather tame.

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